Coronavirus Insanity: Divorce Rates Skyrocket, Everyone Wants Pets, and an Adult Store’s Curbside Pickup Is Ruined

Here are some NOT-so-serious stories we’ve seen about the coronavirus outbreak . . .

1.  Divorce rates are skyrocketing from couples who are stuck in quarantine together.  Some divorce attorneys say they’ve seen a 50% RISE in calls from potential clients.

2.  So many people in New York City have been trying to adopt cats and dogs over these past few weeks that the shelters are running out.

3.  Some NARC in Illinois called the cops on an adult video store that was offering curbside pickup during the stay-at-home order.  The business was deemed non-essential and the manager agreed to shut it down.  Weak.

4.  A 19-year-old woman in the U.K. is spending her time in quarantine calling her exes to see what went wrong . . . and now she’s sharing the results.

5.  A guy in Spain disguised himself as a dog so he could leave his house without being fined.

6.  A guy in Mexico who was self-isolating attached a note and some money to his pet Chihuahua’s collar and sent him to the store for Cheetos.  And it actually worked.

7.  Do you know how to spell “quarantine”?  Because the popular misspelling online is “corn teen.”

8.  A guy in the Maldives was arrested for leaving a resort to swim to another resort to get cigarettes.

9.  A 75-year-old man shopping during the senior shopping hours at a Publix grocery store in Florida told a reporter, quote, “I only got what I need.  I don’t know what you need all that toilet paper for unless you have a really big butt.”