Tattoos Guys Should Never Get

No matter how many dumb things you did growing up, you still pulled through unscathed. A lot of guys didn’t, however, and now have a lifelong reminder of their idiocy, which comes in the form of a bad tattoo. says these are the tattoos guys should never get:

A SUPERHERO EMBLEM — Yes, Batman is one bad bat, Spider-Man is cool, and it’s awesome that Superman can subdue an intergalactic menace with a flick of his cape. The emblems emblazoned on their chests represent heroic greatness in their stories, but when they’re tattooed on you they look a bit silly.

A MYTHICAL ANIMAL — The idea of getting a mythical animal, whether it’s a giant, elf, sprite or Hydra, is as outlandish as the myths from which they originate.

AN ANCHOR — Do you captain a sea-trawling vessel? Live on a battleship? Sail the high seas as a pirate, or have a girlfriend named Olive and an addiction to spinach? Then anchor’s away. If you answered “no” to any of the preceding, leave the anchor tattoo to true sailors and start thinking about other options.

AN ICONIC FACE — You think Bob Marley’s god and John Wayne is cool. You also have a soft spot for Elvis. Why not immortalize your heroes with a tattoo? It sounds reasonable, but beware: their strong real-life face in photographs can quickly turn into a cartoon on your arm.

BARBED WIRE — This once outsider tattoo is now well-worn in the mainstream, which steals you of any pioneering taste in the matter.

A CHINESE SYMBOL — You may have one already, but it seems that everybody has a Chinese symbol tattoo. And when they’re asked, many say it represents peace, strength, compassion or another pseudo-spiritual theme. What’s worse is that most would admit they can’t verify if that’s indeed what their tattoo means. For all they know it could say “kick me.”

ANY TATTOO ON YOUR FACE — Of course, if you’re planning on joining a freak show and have figured out that you can make a living off it, start inking.